I Talk Too Much
teapayne:

I put a smiley fry in the microwave so next time my mom goes to make something she gets a pleasant yet unpleasant surprise

teapayne:

I put a smiley fry in the microwave so next time my mom goes to make something she gets a pleasant yet unpleasant surprise

cake-stuff:

Banana Chocolate Chip Cupcakes with Chocolate Buttercream
More cake & cookie & baking inspiration: http://ift.tt/1404eu8

Guess I’m having an ungrateful moment here because I’m laying in yet another bed that isn’t mine and the last time I felt at home was probably 10 years ago and I just want somehow to feel like that again

sketchinetch:

cremebuns:

emeralddragoness:

cremebuns:

A man just walked past me and said “excuse me, but you look very nice tonight darlin” I said thank you and he said you’re welcome and walked off. And that is how you compliment a woman without harassing them

No, that is still unsolicited, and thus, harassment. No amount of “darlins” is gonna make me not want to punch your ass for coming on to me without provocation.

GOD

SHUT UP

UR SO STUPID

image

[x]

SERIOUSLYYYYYYYY

megay:

HOW TO PICK UP GIRLS IN 3 EASY STEPS

STEP 1: purposefully bump into girl(make sure you are typing into your calculator while doing this)

STEP 2: say “im sorry. i didnt see you, i was taking inventory of all my lizards”

STEP 3: make sure she sees the number 42069666 on the screen

spoopykatee:

my mom just said “watch this” then ran a red light and said “i just don’t care”

untitled-oct19:

animals-riding-animals:

cat riding dog (wearing sunglasses)

that dog has a frickin cELL PHONE WHAT KIND OF ANIMAL IS THIS

untitled-oct19:

animals-riding-animals:

cat riding dog (wearing sunglasses)

that dog has a frickin cELL PHONE WHAT KIND OF ANIMAL IS THIS